Brunch at Tiffany's

My Top 10 Favorite Christmas Songs

2011-12-23T21:45:00.001-05:00

10. “O Holy Night” by Mariah Carey. Celine Dion has a nice version, too, but Mariah hits that note that can send the pigeons out of the church rafters. Of course that means pigeon poo everywhere…still, a great version of the song. Just duck if you’re near pigeons.

9. Muppet Christmas Carol’s “It Feels Christmas” and “Bless Us All.” The first song is just catchy and cute and the second is a fave because the little frog that plays Tiny Tim coughs at the end and since high school I have thought the froggy coughing is the cutest thing ever. What? It’s Tiny Tim. He’s not well.

8. “Give Love on Christmas” by Johnny Gill. I love that man’s voice. He could sing “Happy birthday” and I’d buy it. They never play this one on the radio though. They never play him on the radio period. Probably jealous of his sexiness.

7. “Joy to the World” was always my favorite as a kid because it meant Mass was over and I could go home and open presents. Hey, I was a kid, you try walking past a living room full of Santa’s best to sit on a wooden pew for an hour. Plus it’s bouncy.

6. “Happy Christmas (War is Over)” by Celine Dion. I prefer Celine’s version to Lennon’s because she gets that anger in her voice that’s more appropriate for the subject matter. It reminds me of when I was a kid and they executed Nicolae Ceausescu at Christmas. Oh sorry, way to bring everyone down. Think happy thoughts.

5. “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey. How can you not like this one? One of her best and before she started doing that odd breathy sing-y thing. I remember finding out the lip liner she used at that time and was so happy when I found out I already owned it.

4. “Santa’s Got a Brand New Bag” by SheDaisy. It’s jazzy and fun and one of the only songs I can think of with the sister, Kristyn, as the lead. Her voice is deeper and I don’t know why she doesn’t sing the lead more often. Plus, we Krysten/Kristyns with “y’s” in our names have to stick together.

3. “Blue Christmas” by Elvis. It’s not officially the Christmas season until I hear this song. He makes the holiday hot.

2. “Last Christmas” by George Michael. I don’t think this is a shocker I’d have this on my list. I heard it for the first time while in grade school trying on clothes in Mary Anne. Remember that store? There were no doors on the dressing rooms. Classy. I thought, “That sounds like George!” My mom and I ran to Record Town and asked and the guy said it was a Wham! song. Plus if you’ve seen the video it’s full of 80’s awesomeness including a full length fur coat on a man. This is good stuff people.

1.“Every Year, Every Christmas” by Luther Vandross. It’s the perfect melancholy “missing someone” sort of song with that sexiness only Luther could put on a Christmas song without making it weird. Loved him, love the song. Great video for it, too.

Honorable mentions: “December Song” by George Michael. It’s really the cute video that I like more than the song. It’s a little sad, but the video is so adorable. Plus, it’s George, so how can I not like it? Also “Jingle Bell Rock.” I don’t care for the song, but it was one of my Grandpa’s favorites so it doesn’t feel like Christmas till I hear it.

What are your favorite Christmas songs?

New review

2011-08-06T18:54:00.001-04:00

Check out my review on Rebecca Cantrell' latest, A Game of Lies over at Authors and Appetizers.

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/08/game-of-lies-by-rebecca-cantrell/

Read-a-thon

2011-07-12T22:56:00.002-04:00

I'm doing the Once Upon a Time read-a-thon and it's not going well seeing as I had a 16 hour power outage that left me in the dark. But I did get some reading done. I'm currently working on ""A Game of Lies" by Rebecca Cantrell. Great so far! Here's a review of another great one I read and enjoyed called "Hemingway Deadlights."

Hemingway Deadlights: A Mystery is set in 1956 and Papa Hemingway is at the point in his career where he has stalled a bit in his writing and is drinking even more heavily than usual. Hemingway is living in Key West Florida when the book begins and spends his days drinking. Soon he finds out a friend of his, a local fisherman named Peter Cuthbert, was harpooned to death and the polic department isn’t exactly on the case. Since his writing isn’t going anywhere, Hemingway decides to take a crack at solving the crime himself. He travels to Cuba and meets with a mobster, Fidel Castro, and Che Guevara. Guevara informs him that Cuthbert was more than just a simple fisherman. He soon gets up caught in a situation between the FBI, CIA and Batista’s corrupt government in Cuba.

The book shows us the beginning of Ernest’s paranoid and the downfall of his career due to writer’s block, mental illness, and booze. The book even opens with Hemingway falling off his roof drunk and ending up in a cast. We also see his paranoia and drinking binges taking affect. This is an entertaining take on the writer’s life having him solve crime while being chased by mobsters, spies, the CIA, etc. The author stays true to Hemingway’s personality and traits which makes for an entertaining story.

I ♥ Dave Barry

2011-06-09T01:31:00.001-04:00

Check out my new review on Dave Barry's latest book!

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/06/ill-mature-when-im-dead-dave-barrys-amazing-tales-of-adulthood-by-dave-barry/

What Would You Do?

2011-05-31T19:31:00.002-04:00

Check out my new review on "This is Not The Story You Think It Is" by Laura Munson. Whatwould you do if your husband said he wasn't sure he ever really loved you and wanted out of your marriage?

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/05/not-story-think-season-of-unlikely-happiness/

Mr. Right or Mr. Good Enough?

2011-05-04T23:50:00.001-04:00

Recently reviewed a book about making the case for settling for Mr. Good Enough and not the movie fantasy version of Mr. Right. Let me know your thoughts!

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/05/marry-him-case-for-settling-for-mr-good-enough-by-lori-gottlieb/

New review up!

2011-04-28T17:14:00.000-04:00

Check out my new review of this hilarious memoir!

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/04/someone-will-be-shortly-notes-from-perfectly-imperfect-life-by-lisa-kogan/

Contest Time

2011-04-26T16:16:00.001-04:00

Head over to Authors and Appetizers to win a copy of Learn Something Every Day today only!

Leave a comment on the Authors and Appetizers blog to enter to win one of two copies. Include your email address with your comment so we can find you if you are the winner! Winners will be chosen at 7 p.m. CST

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/04/win-copy-of-fun-trivia-book-learn-something-every-day/?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+Authorsandappetizerscom+%28authorsandappetizers.com%29

New Book Review!

2011-04-07T01:49:00.002-04:00

Check out my review on "When We Were Strangers" on Authors and Appetizers!

http://authorsandappetizers.com/2011/04/when-were-strangers-by-pamela-schoenewaldt/

Live Like Elizabeth Taylor

2011-03-23T17:49:00.002-04:00

I’ve always loved Elizabeth Taylor, but in the last three years I became more familiar with her movies because the Portuguese cable company, MEO, played her films all the time. “Cat on a Hot Tin Roof” was on a few times a month, ditto “Giant,” “The Last Time I Saw Paris,” “Butterfield 8,” and even some films from her that I wasn’t even aware she had made. I always wondered why the Portuguese were so fascinated with her in particular since there were rarely any Grace Kelly movies on, or Audrey, or Carole, or even Marilyn. Maybe it was the dark hair. After all their version of “Alice in Wonderland” in their parade features several brunette Alices and not one blond.

But then again, how could you not be fascinated with her? I had violet colored contacts in high school and all through college and grad school due to her. Of course with my super dark hair (yes, that is my natural color), violet was the only shade that worked on me, but when I did a makeup segment on the news and someone commented about the young Elizabeth Taylor with the “non-gummy lipstick,” my day was made. I actually worked with a makeup artist who had done her makeup. He did my makeup and I remember one of the girls in the dressing room asking him if she really had violet eyes and he said no, crystal blue, which was a bit disappointing, but then I think how gorgeous she was in the black and white movies that it doesn’t really matter.

My dad and I went to classic movie day at the Courtland Center Cinemas in Flint, Michigan to watch “A Place in the Sun” and my first thought was, she’s on a huge screen and she has no pores. None. Not a one. Of course this was in my Biore pad obsession days, but still. Her skin was completely creamy and flawless.

Elizabeth packed a lot of living into her 79 years. She had many bad illnesses, almost dying a few times, losing a loved one, marriages, divorces, but you can’t say she didn’t really live. So many of us, myself included, play it safe and take the road more traveled, but Elizabeth went for it in every aspect of her life. Maybe that’s a lesson for us all.

Boxes Everywhere

2011-02-14T01:46:00.001-05:00

There are so many reasons to hate moving. The worst part? Having your nice clean, once sanitary things placed in a box where they are touching stuff that you really thought you threw out. Like when my beautiful throw pillows that can’t be disinfected are placed on the same shoe racks that once held shoes. And not just any shoes. Shoes that walked on ancient European streets that were riddled with stray dog excrement and a trillion years of disease. Remember there were plagues in Europe and your history books had illustrations of carts holding bloated corpses they took off the streets due to said plagues. Hence why my shoe dirt is not ordinary shoe dirt. Plus the road across the street from where I lived had animals on it daily when the farmers walked their cows down it. Why? I still have no clue. Maybe cows need exercise? But it is interesting to note that European farmers dress a lot better than American ones. They would spit on a John Deere hat. But nonetheless, the dirt on my shoes is nothing you’d want on your throw pillows.

Since my stuff was coming over from Europe on a boat, and we informed it would sit at the port for a good three months, I decided to put my books and papers and past work in plastic storage bins. I figured it would keep everything clean, dry, and safe. Well, safe-ish. Then, yesterday, I found 2 of the plastic lids with a mystery crud on them. Was it rat poop? Innocent dirt? Nasty, slutty dirt? Or Indiscriminate unrecognizable sludge? No clue. My worst fears tell me it’s rat poop. Or mice poop. Rat poop sounds grosser, but really, is mice poop any better? No. And of course one of the nasty bins somehow had the top pop off and the tape that was holding it on as a secondary security system also came off. So did anything get inside? No way to tell. Things like that make me wish I had just set the books in that box on fire. It’d be less painful than letting them get defiled by whatever that evil is on the lid. And even if I do convince myself it’s just some odd shaped dirt, I know myself well enough to know I’ll never be comfortable putting those books on my nice bookcase.

I haven’t even opened that many boxes and so far I’ve found wrinkled scrapbook stuff, boots with mildew, and a purse that looks like an elephant sat on it. I haven’t opened any of the boxes with breakables in it yet, but I admit, that’s partly because I’m scared. Oh well, here’s hoping the rest of the boxes are poop-free. And pray that no bats fly out. I don't think my heart could take it.

Is It Spring Yet?

2011-02-05T16:19:00.002-05:00

I am not prepared for this weather. I just came from a place where it got not colder than the 60’s and now I have to put on gloves and a coat everywhere I go. A coat? Seriously? Everyday? And I actually wear sweaters now. I forgot how much I hate wearing a coat inside stores and nothing’s worse than a hot heavy sweater under a coat when you come in from the cold and go into a chop that’s toasty and you begin to bake. I was putting up with this cold, but then winter decided to push me and add freezing rain to the mix. I dealt with the snow, but the ice thing is a whole other thing. It makes everything dangerous and it knocked off my freakin’ power for like, six hours. And everyone knows you can only keep the food in your fridge safe for four hours.

Maybe I’d be less bitter if the boots I needed hadn’t sold out. Or if the power hadn’t gone out during Brooke and Julian’s wedding on “One Tree Hill.” By the way, didn’t you expect her dress to be cuter considering she’s a designer? And what’s with Julian’s bangs?

They say the groundhog didn’t see his shadow so spring will come, but I look outside and am not so sure. I guess I don’t need spring to hurry up, but I’d at least like to make it to my mailbox without dying. I’m a simple girl with simple needs.

I Gotta Have Faith--and Now I Finally Do!

2011-01-27T16:22:00.003-05:00

I went back in time today. No, not some “Being Erica,” time traveling therapy session. Today I got the George Michael Faith box set my husband ordered for me for Valentine’s Day. I opened the heavy box (to me it was heavy, probably not to normal people) and instantly went back in time to that kid who used to sit in front of the TV hoping and praying MTV would play “Father Figure” just one more time. As I opened the box, I found the photos (all hot, like Hottie McHot-hot kind of hot), a concert poster, CDs, and a record. I never had a George Michael record, but the second I took it out of the sleeve, I remembered my mom pulling out her old records to play for me while she’d do my hair. I don’t even know the last time I saw a record—maybe at a club years ago? But there it was, the album I never got as a kid because it was banned by some city or country or dictator as well as my mother.

Even though I wasn’t allowed to buy the album, I found ways around that. I taped songs off the radio, but then I got my opportunity. I had to make a commercial for a modeling thing to show how I’d handle myself on camera. They said I could write my own script and choose what product I wanted to pretend to promote. I decided to use the album, borrowed my friend Wendy’s tape as my prop, and wore the George Michael sweatshirt my mom bought me for Christmas. The commercial went well (the woman running the camera was a huge George fan, so there were many close-ups of the cover), and it gave me the opportunity to listen to the whole album until I gave it back to Wendy. It was amazing.

Oddly, my mom allowed me to buy the videos, but not the CD, so I had some George stuff, but it was a while before I owned the album. My mom always thought my crush on George was due to the fact she tried to ban him from the house (although she also bought me most of the singles, maybe because they were radio approved?) But as I was looking through the booklet that came in the set today, it reminded me of why I started liking him. Even though I liked the songs, and thought he was cute, I think my big attraction was the fact he talked about the process that went into making the album. That would appeal to a kid whose teachers were already steering her into going into writing. I recall all those interviews and MTV pieces on him that I watched transfixed and about passed out when I realized one of them is included on the DVD.

It’s amazing how just a few pictures, songs, an interview, and a record could completely take me back in time. Now excuse me, I have to go be a kid again.

Giveaway!

2011-01-23T16:41:00.001-05:00

Check out my friend Rachel's blog, "Come What May," and her new kitchen utensil giveaway!

http://the-come-what-may.blogspot.com/2011/01/1st-blog-giveaway-by-come-what-may.html

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Valentine's Day

2011-01-21T16:33:00.003-05:00

My Christmas decorations didn't show up in time for me to decorate the new house for Christmas, so I only had a couple of things up that were sent to me as housewarming gifts. However, Valentine's Day is my favorite holiday so I had to decorate for it. I had brought a bunch of Valentine decorations to Portugal, but when I moved from one place to another there, well they were victims of the great sewer backup. Rest in peace little decorations.

I must say this year it wasn't easy finding decorations. Some of the stores had stuff that was too high priced ($50 for small heart bookends?) or they had more stuff for parties or gifts. But I kept looking and found a few things. I saw some ornaments and thought how cool would it be to have a Valentine tree? I only bought two at first because I wasn't sure I'd find a tree. Then I hit another store and there it was: a six foot pink tree. It was a pre-lit Christmas tree, so it was 75% off. It was perfect. It was the right shade of pink--that Barbie/Katie Price shade and they had ornaments and wire garlands. So I spent my Thursday night decorating it.

Now do I decorate for St. Patrick's Day next or head right into Easter?

My 2010

2011-01-02T18:20:00.001-05:00

Every blogger has been getting in on this and seeing as I've jumped on every bandwagon since the Cabbage Patch Kid craze, I had to join in, so here is my 2010 review.

1.What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?

Started watching Katie Price’s reality show. It was oddly addictive. I knew I had watched too much when I caught a glimpse of myself wearing bright pink lip gloss usually reserved for hookers in North Korea with a matching bright pink top and pastel sweatpants.

2.Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

My resolution was, “don’t die,” and that was accomplished. Fingers crossed for this year.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Several friends. Mostly baby boys. And I now have an imaginary adopted baby named Charlemagne that I was going to talk to in public to see if that’d get me off the island earlier. No baby news here. I have no biological clock and my husband doesn’t care for children at all.

4. Did anyone close to you die?  

Other than many of my hopes and dreams?

5. What countries did you visit?  

While living in Portugal, I had several dreams where the island drifted and I was in Antarctica and South Africa. I believe dream visits count, so I spent a considerable amount of time with penguins.

I6. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?

Patience, sanity, a DVD set of “Home Movies.” The usual.

7. What dates from 2010 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Winning the gold in figure skating in the Olympics. I was fabulous and my costume was so adorable.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?  

Other than the gold medal? Um, not flying to England to stand outside of the prison George Michael crying holding a sign saying, “Marry me, George.” Even I was surprised I kept my dignity on that.

9. What was your biggest failure?
I had a whole speech planned to tell someone off, but when I had to meet with them, I was in a position where I needed them, so I had to keep my little mouth shut. My dad always says never burn your bridges, but I enjoy pouring gasoline on them and lighting them ablaze.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No comment

11. What was the best thing you bought?

A Faberge egg with the New Kids on the Block riding merry-go-round horses when you open it.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Everyone who sent me a care package that kept me alive on the island. Except for the person who sent me something that spoiled and almost made Mr. H vomit when he opened it. What the hell were they thinking sending something that spoils in the mail?

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?  

I get enraged more than depressed. I’ll keep the personal one to myself, but George Michael kissing that male escort in Australia didn’t do my blood pressure any favors.

14. Where did most of your money go?

I just moved from one country and all my stuff is still stuck there at the port, so where didn’t my money go would be the better question.

15. What did you get really excited about?

Coming back to the U.S., I got excited about going to Kmart and the fact it was open 7 days a week and past 7 p.m.

16. What song will always remind you of 2010?

“Cry Me Out” and “Just Haven’t Met You Yet.” Oh Pixie Lott, you got me through some nights. And when that Michael Buble song comes on when I’m in a grocery store, it makes me want to dance like they did in the music video. I always wonder if anyone else feels that way when they hear it, too.

17. Compared to this time last year, are you: 
(a) happier or sadder?
(b) thinner or fatter?
(c) richer or poorer?

(a) Happier. I’m in the land of 24 hour grocery stores.

(b) Probably bigger seeing as there’s food in this country
(c) Poorer seeing as we’ve had to start over from scratch. I can’t wait to get to the point where I can blow my money on stupid frivolous crap. Like more North Korean bright pink lip gloss, but this time with shimmer.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?  

I wish I had bedazzled more of my clothes and bought more European tabloids with celebrities no one in the U.S. has ever heard of, but who are awesomely Euro trashy.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?  

Watching “Jerseylicious.”

20. How did you spend Christmas?

2009 brought flooding to the island and no mail or food plane, so really being dry and fed was a huge step up.

21. Did you fall in love in 2010?

Yes, with Applegate Farm’s gluten-free chicken nuggets and Organicville’s Ranch dressing. I may divorce my husband so Ranchie and I can run off together.

22. What was your favorite TV program?

“Being Erica” and I used to watch some European decorating shows and house hunting shows and scream at the TV, “You’ll fall through the floor! Nothing’s been updated in 100 years! That’s not quaint, that’s Legionnaire’s waiting to happen, you dmbass!” And wondering why they’d buy a home in a country they’d most likely get shot in and/or decapitated.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year? 

Yes, I do. I got over my hatred of 2 other people and it’s been replaced when someone else.

24. What was the best book you read?  

I was doing book reviews last year and there were some doozies, but Pop on Top is a go-to classic. That and Boy George’s “Take it Like a Man.”

25. What was your greatest musical discovery? 

Pixie Lott. Although I think that was 2009. And that weird little French guy who was like an emaciated Moby who sat barefoot while naked chicks sat around him and he sang and looked depressed. I would have liked to have been in the meeting when they decided to sign him.

26. What did you want and get?  
A proposal from Bret Michaels. Bastard won’t make an honest woman of me.

27. What did you want and not get? 

I only got one gift card & I love those. Oh and George to dump a certain Texan boy toy.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

Sex and the City 2. I watched “Not without My Daughter” for the 1st time and got some neato ideas if I should ever become the leader of a country. I could put my picture on anything and everything.

29. What did you do on your birthday?

I don’t recall what I did. I remember the presents the most. The presents were most awesome this year.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?  

If I hadn’t seen George Michael in a bathing suit and Crocs while rubbing suntan oil on a male escort. I could have done without that.

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2010?  

Getting mistaken for a local and/or European told me I was on the right path with my clothes. Looking back, I guess I was channeling Katie Price on her off-days, not on her showing off her man-made gifts.

32. What kept you sane?  

Good mail days and new magazine day. And that is the honest truth.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Do you need to even ask? Since age 10, George Michael. I also developed a slight crush on Bryan Greenberg, but only when his hair looks good.

34. What political issue stirred you the most? 

I got enraged over something a European leader did, but he’ll shoot you as to look at you, so I won’t mention his name. Crap, I’ve said to much. He’ll probably put mercury in my Coke.

35. Who did you miss?  

My imaginary friend couldn’t take island life and dumped me.

36. Who was the best new person you met?  

I met some great new people in Ohio and made some friends in Portugal. And in my mind Kai on “Being Erica” is my pal.

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2010.  

Do not assume a red top you have washed a million times is not going to turn your only white bra pink. Oh and stay off the internet the day George Michael is photographed kissing a male escort while wearing Crocs.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

Karma Chameleon

Getting Settled

2010-12-17T19:55:00.000-05:00

We’ve been here just under a month and I’m still getting used to the fact I can go out and buy food at any time of the day or night. And the shelves aren’t empty and if they do run out of something, they’ll restock it in a few days, not a week or month or never! It’s crazy. It’s freezing here so I am now the proud owner of two new winter coats (my previous one was a show pony, not a work horse) and have lost many a glove all ready. I am truly my father’s daughter. My mom used to threaten to make him wear mittens on a string and really, that would be the economical choice for me.

I’m happy to say this year feels like Christmas. When you’re in a place where the coldest it gets is 60-something and there’s no snow, it doesn’t feel very Christmas-y. Also, the Portuguese decorate a little different and with the streets being so narrow, it’s not easy to drive around to see the decorations like it is in the U.S. So walking into stores here and seeing tons of décor and trees and all the snow is amazing. It’s overwhelming (but apparently any store that isn’t a shoebox is overwhelming to me), and part of me thinks it’s a bit decadent with all the toys and things to buy. I’m reeling myself in which is made easier by the fact we are basically starting all over. Our things we stored in South Dakota are not here yet (and I’ve been warned most might be broken based on other people’s experiences) and our stuff we had in Portugal is still there and not expected to get here for three months. So we didn’t even have a trash can, a pot or pan, or even a cup to our names. So we’re starting from scratch.

I’m excited that we found a place to live. It had a lot of what we were looking for (fireplace, gourmet kitchen, nice office space, first floor master and laundry) and oddly the walls are the exact color I had planned to paint. My only complaint…who am I kidding? Complaints, plural, have been the plumbing issue, my lack of love for the stove, and the lack of lighting. The great room gets so dark at night. I need a visit from the lamp fairy.

There’s still so much to do and get ready, so no trips planned. I’m a little disappointed by that, but someone I live with is happy to stay home. I’m just happy to not have to get on anymore planes, pack, or worry about whether or not the food plane made it in or not. To me, that's a dream come true.

This time I'm getting interviewed!

2010-10-02T15:19:00.001-04:00

Writer Claudette Young was gracious enough to interview me on her fabulous blog. Check out the piece here:

http://claudsy.wordpress.com/2010/10/01/interview-with-krysten-lindsay-hager/

My Illegal Adoption

2010-09-01T15:45:00.002-04:00

I'm really not sure why I still remember this, but today, September first, is both my Cabbage Patch Kids' birthdays. So happy birthday Sandra Kate & Amanda Nicole wherever you are, which, knowing my mother (your fake grandma) you're both probably in a landfill somewhere. So sorry, what can I say? I don't even think your adoption was legal.

I still remember getting Amanda (formerly Paula Geraldine) for Christmas and my mother was trying to get me to name her Amanda Stacey Selby (Selby for actor David Selby from "Falcon Crest" so her initials would be A.S.S. Great parenting. Two years later, Sandra Kate arrived and she was a World Traveler from the Netherlands. Gotta love the foreign adoptions. My mother told my grandpa to bring his camera over to take her passport photo. It was so frustrating because I wanted her passport to look exactly like the one on the box (with just her face) and he kept getting a pic of her propped up on a chair and you know airport security would not allow her to get on a plane with that passport.

I was never big into baby dolls, I was more a Barbie kind of girl, but it was fun to dress them up and have Cabbage Patch Sleepovers. Who would have thought the little sweatsuits my mother bought for them would have predicted where I went to college?

So happy birthday Amanda Nicole and Sandra Kate. I hope you found happiness and that your illegal adoption will not follow me should I be nominated for the Supreme Court one day.

Remembering Carolyn and John

2010-07-16T21:31:00.002-04:00

I first heard about Carolyn Bessette back in high school where I was obsessed with fashion and spent more time pouring over magazines than my school books. I was in sociology class when I first saw a picture of her at a dinner with John F. Kennedy Jr. I had, like every other female with a pulse, thought he was adorable since he tamed his huge hair. I remember going to New York in 1997 and telling my sister we had to save our film when we went to Central Park in case John was playing football there. I literally took the camera from her and said, "Take all the pictures you want when we get more film, for now, get your priorities straight."

When I first heard the news in 1999 that their plane was missing I felt sick. I felt worse when they found the wreckage. But what shocked me in the days that followed was the way Carolyn's name was smeared in the press. They blamed her for a late take-off, for possibly using her phone while in flight, and accused her of everything under the son. This was a woman who shunned the spotlight even when every magazine on the planet wanted her on the cover. Now she was being torn apart on the tabloid covers. It was disgusting.

I had always admired Carolyn's style and I admit I bought things she had. The many black dresses that I bought because they were replicas of hers, the brown Calving Klein pants, the camel skirts, etc. And, yes, that is why back in 1999, I dyed my very dark brown hair blond for the first time. Sure my first attempt was more Jennifer Lopez than Carolyn, but by the end of the summer I had Carolyn blond...and a lot less money in my bank account due to the constant root touch-ups. But she was my fashion icon and if you look at any picture of her today, her clothes and makeup do not look like they were from eleven years ago, but as if she could have been photographed yesterday.

I live right on the Atlantic Ocean right now, although since I'm in Portugal I am on the other side of the coast. For the last three years being here, I have thought about the three of them on this day and the fact they passed away in the ocean and said a little prayer. Normally celebrity deaths are sad, but then the feelings pass, but with this tragedy, it was harder to let go of somehow. Rest in Peace John, Carolyn, and Lauren.

Seraphine DVD Review: PopSyndicate.com

2010-06-17T12:11:00.000-04:00

Check out my review on this French film about a cleaning woman who went on to become a famous artist.

Seraphine DVD Review: PopSyndicate.com

Five Minutes of Heaven DVD Review: PopSyndicate.com

2010-06-17T12:10:00.000-04:00

Check out my review!

Five Minutes of Heaven DVD Review: PopSyndicate.com

A Night of Long Knives (Hannah Vogel) by Rebecca Cantrell Books Review: PopSyndicate.com

2010-05-31T16:46:00.000-04:00

Check out my review!

A Night of Long Knives (Hannah Vogel) by Rebecca Cantrell Books Review: PopSyndicate.com

Remembering a great man who meant a lot to me

2010-05-19T11:58:00.002-04:00

A few years ago, I got an assignment to cover a school anniversary and I chose to write about the priest who made that school a success. Father Bush was not just the priest who baptized me, but who helped teach me about God and how to be a good person (stop laughing, I have my moments). He retired when I was little, but still came around the school and church and we frequently ran into him in town. He always acted as if I was just the person he had wanted to see. When he died, a different newspaper didn't exactly do a great job in summing up his life. To be honest, that particular paper had a knack for less than stellar pieces on those who had just passed away. So writing about him was my way of paying tribute to him--the tribute he deserved years ago. Oddly, I wrote the article in the early spring in 2007, but they decided to hold on to it because they were running graduation stories. It was then that I realized the anniversary of his death was coming up on the very day the paper would come out, so publishing it that May worked out perfectly. I've included the link so you can read the story yourself if you run your mouse across the title at" Holy Family parishioners remember Father Bush at the bottom.

Holy Family parishioners remember Father Bush

Live to Tell by Wendy Corsi Staub Books Review: PopSyndicate.com

2010-05-18T22:13:00.001-04:00

Live to Tell by Wendy Corsi Staub Books Review: PopSyndicate.com

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Interview

2010-04-15T11:38:00.001-04:00

Check out my interview (where I'm the one being interviewed for a change!) at The Gift: A Blog for Caretakers of Sensational Children from Lily Wolf Words.

http://lilywolfwords.blogspot.com/2010/04/q-with-expert-krysten-hager-writer-and.html

April's Fool

2010-04-01T11:25:00.001-04:00

April Fools' Day has never been one of my favorites. Maybe it's because I don't enjoy pranks or perhaps it's deeper than that. I have a feeling my mom might have a little something to do with my fear of this day. It started when I was a little girl and my mom was pregnant. She called me into the living room and told me we should play an April Fools' Day joke on my dad. Her joke? She told me pregnant women faint a lot and it's no big deal, so run outside and tell dad that she passed out and she'll lie on the floor when he comes in. So like an obedient little idiot, I ran outside and told my father, who was innocently cutting the grass, that my mom was now sprawled out on the floor. He ran in (who knew my dad could sprint like that?) to find her on the floor. As he panicked, she began laughing. To his credit, he laughed it off, but looking back on it....yeah, not so funny.

Then there was the time when I was in fifth grade. My mother came into my room and told me she just heard my crush, George Michael got married and did I know who Karyn White was? That was his new bride. I recall sitting straight up in bed about to cry. Then she said, “April Fools!” and preceded to tell my that when I was at school, shen went through all my music to find a female singer that was the right age and who I would of course know about, but someone not so hugely popular that I would think that my mom would be aware of to really seal the deal. “I knew if I picked someone too popular you might think I was making it up, but Karyn was perfect!” Looking back on it, maybe she should have gone with her plan B, which was to tell me George had come out in a TV interview, since back then, his sexuality was more of a question mark. Had she gone that route, she might have saved me from tears and therapy years later.

So this year, I plan not to deceive nor be deceived. So if you have a great idea for a prank, leave me out of it. And I have Caller ID, so if my mom calls, I may or may not be picking up until it is safely April 2nd. I will not be April's fool again.

An Award!

2010-03-25T17:02:00.002-04:00

Marjolein from Marjolein Book blog (http://marjoleinbookblog.blogspot.com) just gave me the One Lovely Blog Award! Thanks so much, Marjolein! I'll be looking for other blogs to give it to soon.

Best of 2009: Books Books Review: PopSyndicate.com

2010-01-15T18:30:00.001-05:00

Best of 2009: Books Books Review: PopSyndicate.com

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How to Be DVD Review: PopSyndicate.com

2010-01-10T20:20:00.001-05:00

How to Be DVD Review: PopSyndicate.com

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Christmas

2009-12-29T14:59:00.002-05:00

This Christmas was a little different than the rest. For one, we hadn’t had mail here in going on two and a half weeks. So no mail in and no mail going out. So I didn’t even bother to send out my second batch of cards. Also the plane that brings food to our grocery store was delayed so it meant we didn’t have anything nice for Christmas. We had just a few odds and ends at home, so we ended up with just chicken soup for Christmas dinner. My husband and I were both sitting there like Oliver Twist wondering, “Please sir, can I have some more?” Later he was grinding his teeth because a relative kept on about all the food they had there. Not cool when someone has stated they are reeeeallly hungry and just had soup to eat.

So today our gifts and cards from the U.S. arrived. My husband brought them home during lunch and, since he had to head back to work, he opened his stuff up fast. So after he left, I opened the presents that came in the mail by myself. It was so weird opening gifts alone. It was like spending the holiday by myself. You’d think that’d feel lonely, but it was quite satisfying because if I wanted to freak out and be materialistic and shriek, I could. And if I didn't like something that was way too huge on me, I didn't have to be fake and pretend to not hate it or worry about looking ungrateful. Plus, I got the bubble wrap all to myself. Popping nirvana.

Every Christmas there seems to be a resounding theme. There was the year everybody gave me something purple, the year I got all silver hoop earrings in various sizes, and how can we forget the year that was all DKNY? One of the best years ever. This year Elvis and Hello Kitty kept cropping up as magnets, pens/pencils, calendars, office stuff, decorative things, etc. Oh, and bracelets and pillows. As I write my rear is perched on a very comfy and pretty new pillow. Jealous? You should be. It’s awesome.

It always makes me smile at how the gifts that people pick out for you show how much they really know you. My husband is excellent at picking out what he knows I’ll like. I can be really picky about purses and clothes, but he is one of the few people who get it right every time. Then there are others who obviously don’t know what size I’d wear and one year you wind up with something that fits a Barbie doll and the next year it’s a sweater that would fit Shamu. They also don’t know (or care) what my style might be or what colors might make me look like I need a transfusion or something. I guess some people know you and then there are some people you never quite connect with there.

On a different note, I have had to order everything online since I moved to the island two years ago. In the past two years there have been companies that wouldn’t know customer service or quality merchandise if it bit them, companies who I put up with their inferior products because they’re one of the few that deliver here or carry what I need, and companies who get it right every time. I won’t dog the bad companies who I will never do business with again or the sub-par ones, but I will say there were two who shocked me. I always thought Nordstrom, Amazon, and Macy’s were the best of the bunch, but I have had a few duds from them and a few returns. The new companies who have managed to deliver in a decent time frame (shocking since it can take a while for stuff to get here) and have it look like what it did on the website (take note, Nordstrom, not everybody wants Minnie Mouse shoes) are Sears and Kmart. I needed some basic home stuff (pillows, towels, etc.) and it got here right away, looked how it did online, and was properly packaged. Why these other companies can’t get it together is beyond me, but hats off to Sears and Kmart.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go and put a pillow over my head. My hubby got a Mannheim Steamroller CD toay and nothing gives me a headache or makes me want to jump out of my skin more. Ugh! The only thing worse for me would be the sound of bells. I once begged to get out of covering a bell concert for the paper one year. I hate ringing bells! If it were up to me, no angels would ever get their wings because all bells would be banned. So having synthesizers and bells together make me want to lose my mind. Merry Christmas and let's have a silent night soon, please? Please???

Friendship Star

2009-12-01T10:41:00.003-05:00

I was excited that my contributor copies of the anthology I wrote for, arrived in the mail this weekend. I had written about a woman I met back when I lived in Grand Blanc, MI. I had been assigned to write an article on her and when I did the interview (over the phone), I felt a real connection to her. A month or two later, she called one of the editors to see if she could get more copies of the article. I happened to be at that office near Flint, MI that day for the Christmas party, so I offered to drop them off. I ended up staying for hours since she had made dinner for me in the hopes I'd stay. After that, we became fast friends and spent a lot of time together. She told me about living in the South and the hardships she went through because of the racism in those days. We shared so much and had so much fun together despite our 40-some year age difference. I was devastated when she told me she didn't think she had a lot of time left because of heart disease. I learned so much from her and losing her was one of the hardest things I've had to deal with. I can only hope that I captured the kind of person she was in my essay so that people can learn from her the way I was blessed to have done.

Detroit candy icon Sanders launches expansion | detnews.com | The Detroit News

2009-10-16T13:51:00.001-04:00

Detroit candy icon Sanders launches expansion | detnews.com | The Detroit News

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Mike's Writing Workshop & Newsletter: Just When YouÃ¢ÂÂre About to Give UpÃ¢ÂÂ¦Think Of Elvis

2009-08-20T15:39:00.001-04:00

Mike's Writing Workshop & Newsletter: Just When YouÃ¢ÂÂre About to Give UpÃ¢ÂÂ¦Think Of Elvis

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Buick Open Bashing

2009-07-28T14:41:00.002-04:00

I read today that golfer Mark Calcavecchia made a negative comment about coming to the Buick Open in Michigan. The quote that upset me was, when discussing rain delays during the tournament he’s currently in, he said, "Ever been to Flint, Michigan?" he asked. "I'm in no hurry to get there.”

First off, the Buick Open is held in Grand Blanc, MI, not Flint, but that’s beside the point. Many of the golfers stay with families as opposed to hotels during the Buick Open. My neighbor had one of the tournament winners stay with her for years and she not only took him around, but also his wife while he was practicing. They also provided day care for the kids of the golfers and the caddies, too. These volunteers go out of their way to make sure the golfers and their families are comfortable and well taken care of and it appears that Mark isn’t exactly appreciative.

Right now Flint is going through a rough time and having him make a negative comment about the city during this time just reeks of kicking someone when they’re down. It’s really not professional to bash a place that’s welcomed you either. Remember Sienna Miller’s unfortunate comment about Pittsburgh? At least she had the class to apologize. Besides, Flint has come along way and the downtown has really been revitalized with new restaurants, etc.

And yes, I am from Grand Blanc originally and I not only grew up attending the tournament, but worked it as a journalist and TV producer’s assistant. I remember marking off Mark’s name on sheets so that we had TV footage of him to use in the specials. He didn’t particularly stand out to me, but you always pay attention to who goes out of their way to be nice to fans as well as the press. Some of the golfers do go out of their way to sign autographs (if asked politely) and chat with fans in the first few days. Some even hand out golf balls to fans. However, when the competition heats, up, people wait until the golfers are done playing for the day to get autographs. Fans, workers, and volunteers have always been pretty courteous and supportive in all the years I’ve attended, so I was hurt to hear anyone making a negative comment.

So for all who are going to the tournament, have a great time. I’ll be watching on TV since I’m out of the country unfortunately. I already know who I won’t be rooting for this year. But here’s hoping Mark Calcavecchia does the classy thing and apologizes….and donates to a local food bank and a charity or two ;)

Grandmothers

2009-07-08T15:35:00.002-04:00

A friend recently shared with me that she found a lily growing in her garden on her birthday last week. She never planted any lilies, but found out that years ago her late grandmother had planted one, but they never bloomed--until now. She thought it was so sweet that she got a present from her grandma. That got me thinking about the shower gift that I got from my grandmother after she had passed. She had died in 1993, yet the gift (her wedding crystal) was found in 2006 the very day before my bridal shower. I wrote about it for an anthology called, Patchwork Path: Grandma's Choice. it's just a really nice reminder that even when people pass on, they are still with us.

MJ

2009-06-27T21:45:00.004-04:00

I've been trying to wrap my mind around Michael Jackson's death. Over here, the European music stations have been playing his music videos non-stop. They've been showing a lot of Michael's newer stuff that I hadn't before like the "Stranger in Moscow" song, etc. But having them go through the catalog of his work really triggered a lot of memories and reminded me what a big part his music played in my life growing up.

I can remember dancing to his music in nursery school. When a neighborhood friend came over to play, I remember she was wearing a Mickey Mouse t-shirt and her mom said, "Annie loves Mickey. She wants to marry him." My mom looked at me (wearing my baby blue iron-on MJ t-shirt) said, "My future son-in-law might be Michael Jackson."

I used to carry my MJ slouchy fake leather purse with his picture on it--the same one all the middle school and high school girls carried. I'd see the older girls at the bus stop with their purse sitting on top of their books, so I'd pull my workbooks out of my Care Bears backpack and set it on top. How they didn't laugh their asses off at me I'll never know.

I listened to his music as a little kid with a crush, then in grade school, and high school. Even over here, I would look up one of his videos on YouTube to listen to or watch as I worked. Had you asked me, who's you favorite singer, I'd say, "George Michael, Elvis, Michael Buble." But when I think about all the great music he's left behind, how could I leave Michael out? Few singers have moved me to tears with their music, but I have teared up when I've heard, "Man in the Mirror," "Heal the World," and "You Are Not Alone."

No matter what happens next, or what we find out, he has left a great musical legacy behind. And that's how I want to remember him.

Contest Winner

2009-05-01T08:34:00.003-04:00

Thanks for entering the contest to win a copy of the Women of Passions anthology. I was thrilled to have my work in this book and excited to share it with everyone. I really appreciated all the kind and encouraging posts! I randomly selected a name and the winner is Melissa! Melissa, I have already sent you an e-mail so I can get your address. Thanks!

Giveaway!

2009-03-29T13:35:00.002-04:00

I’m giving away a copy of a Christian anthology that I have two stories in called Women of Passions: Ordinary Women Serving an Extraordinary God. Their website is: http://womenofpassions.net. It was an honor to be included in this anthology and I’m excited to give a copy out. To be entered in this giveaway all you have to do is leave a comment on this post. You’ll get an additional entry if you follow my blog and another if you link to my contest and let me know about it!

The Break-up Diet

2009-03-27T14:39:00.002-04:00

Check out this interview about a great new book about getting over heartbreak, chocolate, and bouncing back.

http://www.bettyconfidential.com/ar/h/a/a04960.html

Hair Today, Gone in a Few Seconds

2009-03-19T11:49:00.000-04:00

Check out my new essay at:
http://www.newchristianvoices.com/humor/hair-today-gone-a-few-seconds

Stationary!

2009-03-15T14:21:00.001-04:00

There's a fun contest over at: http://drewashleyporter.blogspot.com

I love stationary and this stuff looks so cute!

Oh Baby!

2009-03-02T19:53:00.000-05:00

Check out my new piece on baby names: http://www.newchristianvoices.com/humor/oh-baby

The Big 3 and Me

2008-12-19T11:55:00.002-05:00

I grew up in a suburb near a GM town. However, even with growing up in that area, and driving mostly GM cars (and a Chrysler or two), my family history lies with Ford. My paternal great-grandfather was a racecar driver and mechanic who worked for Barney Oldfield, the racecar driver who made Ford famous. Great-grandpa was able to race at the Brickyard and later opened his own garage. I still remember visiting Auto World in Flint (a car themed amusement park—see the movie “Roger and Me” ) and going on the car history ride where my dad started getting animated. In the ride, there was a display on the ride of a cigar chomping, scarf wearing Barney Oldfield inside a car while it was worked on by a mechanic. My dad started excitedly pointing to the mechanic saying, “That’s my grandpa! That’s my grandpa!” as he almost fell out of the little amusement park car.

My dad later told us when he first heard his grandpa had been a racecar driver, he cracked up saying, “But Grandpa, you drive so slow!” To which his grandfather responded that back in the day, before the new cars could go fast, he once outran a cop on horseback in a Model T. I like to think Great-grandpa added, “Fresh-mouthed whippersnapper,” after telling the story, but I can’t verify that happened.

Ford also played a role in my maternal great-grandfather’s life. He came to this country and took a job working in a mine in Pennsylvania. He worked there a few days before realizing that wasn’t the life he wanted. He and his brothers packed up and left and Great-grandpa decided to go to Detroit where he got a job at Ford. He didn’t speak much English, but he would never say anything negative about his workplace saying (in broken English), “Henry Ford pays a good wage.”

Ford made Detroit what it is and gave it a rich history. As kids we all spent time at the Henry Ford museum or Greenfield Village, which showed us the life of Thomas Edison and encouraged us to not just dream, but to be like Henry Ford and Edison and dream big.

One of my favorite Christmas memories was visiting the Ford Home (Edsel’s) all decorated for the season. Some of my family members have worked there over the years for the family. Plus, the Ford family (Henry II, Christina, etc.) made for some excellent gossip over the years. I once was seated next to one of the hairstylists of one of the Ford wives and I learned some fascinating things...okay, fine, good gossip, but I learned things! Mrs. Ford’s driver however was loyal (yawn) and only spoke highly of her (Edsel’s wife) although did say she could be demanding.

Dodge has also been a big part of Michigan and visiting Meadowbrook (the Dodge home) was also a big highlight for me as a kid. The Dodge’s might not have had a gift wrapping room a’la Candy Spelling, but they had a section in the hallway devoted to it which fascinated me as a kid.

This isn’t just about a few auto plants here and there going bankrupt. It’s about the history of Michigan and the part it played in so many families’ lives. I watched a man on TV who worked for Ford in Dearborn saying he was a third generation Ford auto worker. He said it was more than a job to him—it was part of his family legacy.

I agree with the arguments against bailing out companies, however the Big Three are asking for loans, not a bailout and there’s a difference. Loans get paid back. Why is it okay to bailout Wall Street, but not give help the Big 3? If we don’t help out the auto industry, we’re only hurting ourselves. It’s not just about a bunch of automotive companies, but it’s about families, tradition, and a culture that helped make America what it is today.

Friendship

2008-11-17T13:42:00.000-05:00

I have to admit I wasn’t prepared for life here. The two people who gave me the best insight about military life were my friend, Jen B, and my cousin, Bill. Bill told me just when you get settled and make friends, either they’ll leave, or you will and that’s becoming the trend. In the last place I lived, I went to more farewell parties in less than a year and a half than I had in my whole life. But here it’s a whole different story. Most people are here for only two years, unless they’re single or unaccompanied, then it’s 18 months. So by the time you arrive, a lot of people you meet are on their way out. I have already said good-bye to the people I was closest to when I first arrived. I didn’t expect to make close friends in such a short period of time and then I did and, poof! Now they’re gone, too. It almost makes me wonder if I would have been better off not getting as close so it wouldn’t be so depressing when they all left. However, then I wouldn’t have made the good friends that I did.

It kind of reminds me of a semester in college. You get to know people really well, see them day in and day out, and you’re having lunch together every week day, and getting together on weekends. Then the semester ends and you hardly see each other anymore. You keep in touch, but your schedules are now so different (or they’ve moved an ocean away), so you’re not each other’s priority anymore. But they say everything has a season, and I think there are people who come into all our lives’ for only a season. Maybe so we can both learn something from each other or they need someone like you or me in their lives at that time. Then there are the “keepers,” the people you’ll stay in touch with even if they move to Mars.

Now as I write out my Christmas card list, I’m seeing more and more addresses have changed from last year, but the most important thing is that the friendships stay the same.

Haunted Bloggy Carnival is Here! Over $3726.00 In Prizes! International Too!

2008-10-27T13:53:00.001-04:00

Haunted Bloggy Carnival is Here! Over $3726.00 In Prizes! International Too!

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New article

2008-10-06T21:44:00.000-04:00

I thought I'd share one of my newer articles.

http://wow-womenonwriting.com/24-FE3-SusanShapiro.html

Survey Says

2008-10-03T10:56:00.002-04:00

I was sent this survey and thought I'd share my answers.

Survey says...
Current mood: animated

What does the last comment say?
=== It was from The Big Bopper--how awesome is that that the Big Bopper would write me from heaven? Shut up, that's my story and I'm sticking to it

So what do you want for your birthday?
===I'm still waiting for that pony I asked for at age 3

What color are your eyes?
===that's a very personal question. Are you phishing for credit card info? Police!

What are you thinking about right now?
===That it stinks in here and why do I hear a church organ? Are the angels coming to take me away? Or did I leave the TV on?

When is the last time you were embarrassed?
===When I thought this woman was somebody's kid, but she was the mom.

Are you artistic?
===I can mime like nobody's business

What was the last item you bought?
===A Fabrege egg that has a carousel inside with each member of New Kids on the Block riding a different horse as "Step By Step" plays. Why? What did you buy last?

What would you do if your best friend told you they were moving?
===Take me, please take me with you!!

Apple bottom jeans or hollister gift card?
===Isn't saying you have an apple bottom an insult? Like the Phat jeans. How do they get people to look past that?

At what age do you want to be married?
===I was going for 68, but married a little sooner than that

Where is your mom right now?
===Dort Hwy...if you're not from Michigan you won't get it, but those that do....

What do you currently hear right now?
===Construction workers in the hallway who obviously don't feel the need to use their indoor voices.

Have you ever had your heart broken?
===Reconstructive surgery can do a lot to help that. I know a guy if you need his number.

Have you ever not been able to get someone off of your mind?
===Liberace

When was the last time you wanted to punch someone in their face?
===Right now

When was the last time you swam?
===Last summer. There are jellyfish here & someone I know got stung twice.
Plus Joey from "Friends" would have to twinke on me and that's sick

Autumn Memories

2008-08-18T12:20:00.000-04:00

Why didn't I go to Carleton College in Minnesota? Sure I just found out it existed like, this minute, but that's no excuse. It's all picturesque like someplace one of the Wakefield twins (probably Liz, Jessica's too wild for that town) would have gone. Or where Nancy Drew would have gone to college during brief breaks of crime fighting and mystery solving.

Instead, I went to school in the inner city just blocks away from the gang-infested ghetto and a stone's throw from Crack Alley, the sun dappled lane where all the drug/rehab meeting are so conveniently located near the drug houses. Brilliant planning on that one. Sure my school had it's perks, but it wasn't all cutesy. And, if I went down to the main campus that had more charm, well, let's just say that the old “charming” buildings stunk. They reeked of charm literally. And downtown Ann Arbor has never been my favorite place although if you want to try Ethiopian food and get a brownie from a place that reeks of incense and has a Wiccan symbol on the menu, then that's the place to go. Oddly enough I prefer my brownies witchcraft-free, but I'm a little stuck up that way.

Maybe it's because it's almost fall and I know that I won't have the usual red, yellow, and orange leaves to look at and there will be no hay rides or trips to apple orchards that I'm getting all nostalgic and wanting that new school experience in the autumn. Or maybe I shouldn't have gone to a school that had a river they once dragged for a body while I was in class. Ahh...memories.

Don't Blog Angry & the Field trip

2008-08-01T09:00:00.000-04:00

I haven't blogged in a while because I think, as a rule, people shouldn't blog while angry and I've been less than enthusiastic about life since the flood in our place two weeks ago. I had been so excited to move into a renovated apartment and then, just 2 hours into the move, water came up from the sewer drain in the laundry room. I would hold a funeral service for my clothes, shoes, books, and scrapbooking things, but I fear it would be too emotional. So we were eventually moved to a new place across the hall (not pleasantly, mind you) and then our neighbor's place flooded as well. So I'm trying to be positive and not wait for the other shoe to drop. So I'm not even going to mention that fact my bathroom stinks like Snuggle when my upstairs neighbors wash or the fact my new garbage disposal doesn't work or the lack of a drying cycle on my dishwasher. Not even going to bring it up.

On to more positive things that don't leave me weeping silently (or not so silently) in a corner. I went to a Portuguese Mass in downtown Praia today. There is a man from another island in the Azores that took us on a nice tour last month and today he offered to take us to Mass. I went with another woman and her two kids. One thing I've noticed about the churches here is that they seem enormous and then you go inside and realize much of the space is devoted to the altar and side altars. As big as this chapel was, there were only a handful of pews for sitting. It had two altars side-by-side and only one side was lit with candles. There were statues off to the sides, and when I got up close to the altar I saw a life-sized statue of Mary with Jesus carrying the cross. When I say life-sized I mean Mary standing was taller than me. The church was from the 1500's and had old paintings which had a strong aroma and not in the good way. I also noticed the statues of Jesus on the cross were more gory as the wounds were open and bloody opposed to how we normally see it depicted in the States. I witnesses two women go over to the cross and one woman kissed his feet and another kissed her hand and touched Jesus' hand. It reminded me of my wedding when I took flowers over to the Blessed Mother.

I had been wanting to go to a Portuguese service for a long time and had been told I'd get nothing out of it since I wouldn't understand anything. I have to admit the sermon was long (it went on forever and he had 4, yes 4 typed pages of things to say...single spaced) and I didn't understand it, but I was able to follow everything else since it was the same. And they even say a few words the same. It was also interesting to see the sacristy and read about the statues. St. Rita is very big here. I've found the churches here, even in poorer communities, tend to be quite ornate. Another local church is literally half altar, which is very different from American churches that tend to focus on seating rather than grandeur.

I'm really glad I went out and experience some of the local culture. Sure it meant kneeling on wooden planks (I miss cushioned kneelers), a 4-page sermon and the lack of A/C, but I also got to witness a lot of interesting things I would not have seen in the States. I hope we get to go on another “field trip” soon!

The 80's --a subtle time for fashion

2008-07-02T08:07:00.002-04:00

There have been so many reunion tours lately that I can't help reminiscing on those days and wondering if Debarge will go on tour...and whether or not that would make the Horsemen of the Apocalypse show up.

After the Spice Girls tour did so well I figured the NKOTB would tour again and now they're even doing a single with New Edition. NE was a little before I got into music and I didn't discover them until Bobby Brown went solo and then Johnny Gill came along and they kept talking aobut their old group. I loved Johnny's voice, so I became a NE fan by default. I even went to a New Edition reunion concert...along with a NKOTB one (before they felt too stupid to be called "kids"), a George Michael one, Color Me Badd (in my defense they were performing with Paula Abdul...does this make it better or worse?) and I even saw Tiffany in concert. Jealous? Thought so.

However what I wore to the concerts was a crime against humanity. I distinctly remember an outfit consisting of a short white ruffled skirt with suspenders over a NKOTB t-shirt and a black Samantha Fox/Debbie Gibson hat. (everyone called it a Debbie Gibson hat, but I thought I was more mature and sexy than that, so I used Samantha as my style role model. Really all pre-teens should look up to women who gained fame as topless models). Naturally I wore this with pairs of socks (red and blue with one folded over the other to pick up the colors in the shirt) with those loafers you didn’t tie just wrapped up the laces. And no one laughed at me…probably because they were too busy bent over pegging their pants to notice my outfit.

I also had several pairs of colored jeans. My favorites were a pair of white jeans with flowers all over them that I either wore with a matching short sleeved jacket or s pink jean jackets. Add my slouchy Guess book bag (the one that looked like I washed it with a piece of hot pink chalk) and I thought I was hot. Hotter than hot. Hawt. Sadly I miss those pants. And my lavender jean tote bag. And my electric blue jeans. Frankly, if missing those things is wrong then I don't want to be right.

Oh Boy

2008-06-27T19:29:00.003-04:00

Well, they're not going to let Boy George into the country to tour. Sigh. A great lost for all of Americans. I'd wear a black arm band to protest, but I'm much too lazy to go find a piece of black material...cut it into arm band...I'm getting tired just thinking about it. Instead I will sit in the dark and listen to "Karma Chameleon" and "Bow Down Mister" until the neighbors complain. My only hope is that he'll be able to tour in the States in two years and then I'll be in the front row of the concert. Until then I'll just have to admire his talent for applying eyeliner (seriously, nobody does it better) and enjoy his music on my own.

Why Now?

2008-06-20T09:45:00.002-04:00

When do I leave the country? Except for a brief trip to Canada here and there, practically never. So why then are George Michael, New Kids on the Block (they only call themselves NKOTB because they feel stupid being called "kids" at 40-something) and now Boy George touring the U.S.? Answer: to be cruel. I would love to go to see all the acts on tour, but no, stick me on an island far away from society so I can't. I'd like to think that since all of George Michael's arrests came immediately after I got engaged and then married, that he was struggling to deal with the pain. That being said I do own some lovely real estate known as the Brooklyn Bridge. In my sick mind I can rationalize that it was too painful for NKOTB (especially Jon, he was my favorite) and George to tour with me out of the country because it would be too painful to see me now.

But really I'm owed a NKOTB concert. I did go to one as a kid, but at the height of their popularity my cousin, who as a former drummer for a band, (no need to mention which one--think 80s), had backstage connections and said he could get me backstage to meet the NKOTB. So I go to school and tell all my friends because my cousin's mom is telling me, "No problem." And of course, instead of being happy for me, the girls all get an attitude with me. So as the date of the concert nears (it was in January) and I'm drooling in anticipation, his mom calls to say he has just been promoted at work and that's his first night taking over the new job and it wouldn't look right...blah, blah, my heart broke, blah, blah."

So naturally half the people I told felt bad and the other half thought I made it up. Fast forward a few years to a funeral in 2005. I hadn't seen said cousin for a while since he had moved across the country. Meanwhile, every time the band was mentioned in the last decade, I bring up the heartbreak of that story. So, at the funeral he asks my mother, "I wonder if she remembers I was supposed to take her to a new Kids concert and had to cancel?"

My mom held her tongue and said, "You know, I think she might," which was the politically correct version of, "She only sullies your good name anytime you or the band is mentioned. And you're lucky she's showing restraint right now or else you'd find your brakes cut."

However, seeing as it was a relative closer to him than me, I didn't claw his eyes out because I am classy and reserved that way. Oh, but the pain will never die.

Who Has a Parade at 10:30 at night?

2008-06-19T08:42:00.002-04:00

When we first got here we were told to explore the island and, "don't worry, you can't get lost on an island." Lies. You can get lost on an island especially when they have detours that take you down teensy tiny streets with no street signs and no indication if it's one way and, if it is, which way you're supposed to go. We've had a few issues trying to navigate around those narrow streets, but thought we were getting to know our way around. Then came Sunday.

One thing about this place is there's always a Portuguese holiday and there's always a festival. So on our way home from exploring some volcano rock (I used to go to museums, now I look at steaming rocks, what's wrong with this picture? And does my insurance cover volcanic eruptions?), we found the road we needed to take blocked by a festival. It was ten p.m., and this place doesn't believe in adequate street lights, so we took a tiny, narrow road, ran into traffic confusion (if it's a one-way street, how about marking that and letting you know which way it goes?) and, a half hour later finally found a main road to help us get back home. We thought we were home free...until we came upon a parade blocking the next street. Who holds a parade at 10:30 on a Sunday night? Back to the tiny side roads and gritting my teeth as we nearly sideswiped walls.

Since there are hardly ever street signs, it took us forever to get back and, without decent street lamps, we couldn't even see the part of the island where we were. When we did get back I started thinking that this was my kind of culture. Festivals all the time, parades that only start after dark, stay up late and sleep in...I might just fit in here.

I'm Moving Where?

2008-06-15T21:32:00.000-04:00

When I first found out I'd be moving to the Azores my response was, "Where is that?" I'm not a geography master, but I had never heard of it. I even misspelled it when I tried to "Google" it. Then, when I finally found it, it appeared it was right off the coast of Portugal. I imagined myself taking a little ferry over to mainland Portugal twice a week where I could shop and wander around the downtown wearing fabulous European clothes and heels. Then I was at a furniture store and looked at a globe. Apparently much like mapmakers like to stick Alaska and Hawaii at the bottom of the page as if they're south of California and within yachting distance of each other, the map I saw was off...900 miles off. There is no way to take a ferry from the Azores to Portugal unless you have a death wish. So I found out the cruel reality that I was going to live in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean.

As for me wandering around downtowns in cute outfits and shoes? The downtowns on the island have hills and cobblestone. I, who once only owned one pair of sneakers (a pair of Sketchers I only bought because they were cute), now live in a pair of sneakers. I watch in amazement as the Portuguese women navigate the cobblestone streets in stilettos. It had become a sick goal of mine to walk the streets once in heels without breaking an ankle. The initial goal was to do it without breaking or spraining an ankle, but I'm a realist.

So I hope you'll check in to see how I'm handling island life.

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